How to know when the right time is

Before you start reading this just know that I don’t have a hard calculated answer to this, and I don’t think anyone ever will. But let me offer some pretty average advice, just from a girly trying to figure it out herself. As we navigate our 20s it’s so hard to know and measure what we ‘should’ be doing and at what time, and we put such pressure on ourselves to go; ‘right when I’m 24 I want to start saving for a deposit’ or ‘when I’m 28 I want to think about family planning’.

But with age being just a number, there are no time limits for big decisions like this or guidelines. So how do you know when the right time is? You see I think the problem I have is that I’m such a planner and that’s something I am working on not letting go exactly but trying to not let it entirely consume the decisions I make.

Decisions are tough and if they were easy, the reward wouldn’t be as good. 

Jed and I’s lease is up in London at the end of June, and we have NO IDEA what to do. Do we stay another year in London, but the prices are ridiculous. Do we look at mortgages and deposits, they say the earlier you get on the property ladder the sooner the better, but then do we necessarily need a house so young? Do we move back home with our parents and save, but I haven’t lived with my family in almost four years. If I was to move home I’d need to buy a car to have my own freedom, that’s another expense, do I need to do that?

My point being is it’s so hard to gage what’s right, and I’ve always sucked at making decisions. Your parents then always go ‘ do what feels right’ but with today’s societal expectations and norms I have no idea what ‘feels right’. And I think that comes at an expense of comparing myself. I feel like I try and compare myself to my mutuals and friends when others my age are making certain decisions. I’m like ‘ok, I should do the same’. But I genuinely believe that even though you may be the same age as someone, that doesn’t necessarily mean you’re in the same mindset or timeframe as them, and that is so ok! You can feel like you’re slipping behind or being ready too early when others aren’t, but that’s what makes you instead of some carbon copy of others. 

I think regardless of what the decision is about I think the main thing we can do navigating our 20s, is to hold onto our youth. I know that I always get so ahead of myself, and I get so excited about the future that sometimes I do tend to rush things. Now I’m not saying to take everything slow, hell no! If you don’t want to go a million miles an hour, you do that queen. Just don’t ever feel rushed to make these decisions that don’t feel right, only do it if you get overwhelmed with joy when you speak about the topic, or only if you just can’t sit on it anymore and you just have to do it! Just sit on it! I think that’s always a good test, just let the decision sink in. Don’t act, just sit and think. After a short while if it’s all you can think about, then go for it! That’s always a great shopping tip too ;) ! 

Conclusion being is that these decisions are tough, and some decisions come more naturally and others don’t, same with people. But I think you need to ask yourself three questions;

1) How is it going to affect you in the short term?

2) How is it going to affect you in the long run?

3) How is it going to affect you financially?

I wish money didn’t come into it but in this day and age, but its annoyingly mostly always a factor. If all leads to you being a happier person, then do whatever the hell you want. Because happiness is the one thing you should strive for in life. Prioritise your happiness always!

Bringing us back to our youth… Go travelling, you’re young! Get a mortgage, that’s such an accomplishment! Or don’t get a mortgage, enjoy your youthful freedom! Go back to uni, learn a new course, you’re only going to come out smarter! Buy that bag, you deserved it! Or don’t, it could be an impulse buy, the happiness will rub off in a week! The moral being that all these decisions are catered to the context of the person, the context of you. So don’t base your decisions off of others and what they are currently doing. 

Base it off of what’s really going to make you smile from ear to ear.