Going Home 🏠

Hello my lovely girlies! How are we? I hope you’re doing well and thriving!

I’m currently on a train travelling up to Nottingham, near where my family’s based, to see my mum and my sister for two days.

I always feel a certain way about travelling home, it’s a strange feeling. I love seeing my family and hometown friends, but in a way the place doesn’t feel like home anymore...

And that’s because I’ve finally realised that home isn’t a place, it’s a 'people'. The people that you connect with the most, love and care for. If anything, the place I called home gives me anxiety, to be truthfully honest. I had a very mixed experience in secondary school, and my town is one of those towns where you go to co-op, and you see everyone and their mums.

Where everyone knows everything and everyone, I think the town lives off gossip. Lovely, cute little place just very small. I think with going home, especially after finishing a degree, you always get the question:

“So what’s next for you?”

The number of times I’ve answered that with waffle is laughable: ‘mmmmm just taking time for myself’ or ‘maybe thinking about travelling’. It’s one of those questions I know my friends also hate to answer, because truthfully maybe I don’t know what’s next for me. And that is so fine! It’s better than rushing into a job you’re not going to like or hate down the line, just because you felt like you had to rush an important decision where society deems that you know instantly as soon as you leave any form of education, And honestly after travelling Australia I definitely got the travel bug and want to do more; I honestly can’t recommend doing it and seeing how much the world really does have to offer. It’s such an eye opener!

However, I’m excited to see my sister and mum obv’ course, not to mention our old little girl Mia. She’s a crazy one she is. A toy poodle springer mix, 12, and crazy as ever.  Tonight, I’m being taken to ‘drum fit’ by my sister, whatever that means. She absolutely loves it as a form of fitness, I mean I said I’d go but I have no idea what I’m in for. I believe it involves drumsticks and yoga balls, I’ll leave that one to your imagination...

I think it’s important to do things your loved ones enjoy, to experience that joy with them even if you don’t end up liking it you’ve tried something new. And I know they’ll appreciate it. I’m also very committed to trying new things in 2024. Like I was saying about Australia, the world is so big and there’s so much to offer. This year I’m trying to grab new experiences by the horns, as much as I love what I love and my routine. I really want to start adding in newness to keep learning and having fun with doing so.

The anxiety about my hometown, I’m really not sure where that comes from. And is something I would really love to just not care about. But I know it’s not just me that feels this way amongst my friends. I guess it’s the feeling of bumping into someone unexpectedly that I haven’t seen in a very long time. I mean you go from seeing these people every day whether you got on with them or not, to seeing them down the post office. Whether you say hi or you don’t, whether that would be weird or rude not to, or whether you avoid and turn around.

I guess it’s that pre-assumed factor of whether you have got it together or not. Can you tell I’m an overthinker?

I would love to just not care and just glow with confidence but it’s not reality is it. However, I’m working on it. I think the way I’m thinking about it is that we are all so much older now, all at completely different points in our life. People aren’t scary! Your head just likes to build pictures that frighten you. So, here’s to glowing with confidence we can try fake it till we make it, hey!

Well, I’m off to go see my mum and my sister, excited to spend some time with my family. I hope you have a lovely rest of your day, doing whatever you’re doing my girlie! 

Love Imogen x